His mum might not be impressed, but I sure am.

The drug war has failed so abysmally in England that not only are drugs freely available, they are cheaper than the legal alternative.

A line of cocaine is now as cheap as a pint of beer after the latest alcohol tax rises took effect.

An average pint in Britain has topped £3 following a 4p rise in the budget – making it the same price as a line of cocaine, according to official government figures.

In London the average price of a pint – at £4.06 – is dearer than a hit of heroin.

A line of speed or the cannabis resin for a spliff now costs the same as just two cigarettes, according to separate figures released by the Independent Drug Monitoring Unit, which provides street prices for evidence in courts.

The average price of an ecstasy pill is now £2.91, with some costing as little as £1, while an average hit of heroin is just £3.50.

The charity Drugscope, which has seen a sharp rise in cocaine use, warned it was now cheaper to spend an evening bingeing on cocaine than to spend a night in the pub.

At least “Harm Minimisation” seems to be working. Getting high on Cocaine or Ecstasy is certainly less dangerous than getting a skinful in a UK pub. So if that was the intention, then the UK government should all give themselves a big pat on the back.

I hope it’s not too late for nominations.

Money Quote:

Fuckhead Interviewer: What would you say to other kids who are thinking of partying when their parents are out of town?

Corey Delaney: Get me to do it for you.

Justin Timberlake celebrates Christmas

Ever listened to Garth Brooks and wanted to kill yourself? You are not alone.

The results of a multiple regression analysis of 49 metropolitan areas show that the greater the airtime devoted to country music, the greater the white suicide rate. The effect is independent of divorce, southernness, poverty, and gun availability.

I would like to see a similar study done for Radiohead though.

Classic.

Gary Ablett:

“For some time after it I used to worry about what people thought, until one day Jesus spoke to me and said, ‘Gary, most people don’t even know who they are, let alone who you are, so why should you worry about what they think?’

After that it gets weird.

I missed this one on election day, but one of my mates actually got handed a how to vote card from Kev when he went to vote - apparently whoever was handing out these HTVs were as pissed as crickets before lunch.

Continuing the Taser theme here lately, In the US and Canada, 6 people have been killed in the last week by police armed with Tasers.

Western Australia, the gleaming light of liberalism that it is, is the only Australian state that issues Tasers to all general duty Police officers. That’s 1,500 Tasers issued to WA Police, who as we all know are hardly sober rationalists at the best of times.

These dangerous weapons should immediately be removed from WA Police arsenals.

I finished 5th of 9 candidates in the Stirling HoR election.

Not a bad result on the face of it, but considering I had first position on the poll (and the “Donkey Vote” that goes with it), it’s probably not so impressive.

I did outpoll both Family First and One Nation though, which is nice.

Full breakdown is here

1. Michael Keenan (Liberal)
2. Peter Tinley (Labor)
3. Tamara Desiatov (Greens)
4. Ray Moran (CDP)
5. Sam Ward (LDP)
6. Denise Hynd (What Women Want)
7. Symia Hopkinson (Family First)
8. Alex Patrick (One Nation)
9. Keith Hallam (CEC)

I went into the election planning on preferencing Keenan, but after collecting all the HTV cards from those who were giving them out, Labor was putting me 3rd and the Liberals 4th. So I went tit-for-tat and gave my preference to Tinley.

In the end though, Michael Keenan got up.

Hopefully he’s not a shapeshifting lizard. If he is, I promise to preference the CEC next time.