WHY NOT JUST RUN THEM OVER WITH TANKS

Great News From The Ministry Of Love!

Western Australian Premier Geoff Gallop has released details of a youth curfew policy covering the Perth suburb of Northbridge.

Under the policy, which will apply from Saturday night, children will not be allowed on the streets of Northbridge after dark and unsupervised teenagers under 15 will have a 10:00pm curfew.

Dr Gallop says the curfew will protect vulnerable children from physical and moral danger.

“After 10:00pm I don’t think 13 and 15-year-olds should be partying on the street of Northbridge … and I think we ought to back that up with policy.”

What if they aren’t partying, Dr Gallop? What if they are selling newspapers? Do they get exempt? What if they are playing footy in the park?

I’m going to let my readers in on a secret that, for obvious reasons, can’t be printed in the newspaper:

This is the WA government’s response to the “Aboriginal Problem”. You see, the problem is that a few gangs of Aboriginal youths have been causing trouble and committing crimes in the Northbridge area.

It’s difficult because you can’t actually prosecute children, especially Aboriginal children, for crimes that they commit. It’s against about 10,000 Unicef guidelines or something.

Because they can’t actually legally do anything to the individuals, the WA government has instead decided to ban all kids from going into Northbridge at all. Presumably now they’ll just all congregate in the Perth train station, which will be MUCH BETTER!

Am I the only person who thinks that Dr Geoff Gallop is a ginormous fuckwit? What’s he a doctor of anyway? MORONOLOGY?

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