So Funny Lah!

Conrad groupie and self-described Sarong Party Girl Isabella now has her own blog up and running. She’s also posted a defence of being a SPG while making extra sure not to offend anyone:

And on to reason two. And this really is a big deal to me. Caucasians are better then local men in bed. But let’s just not go into the tasteless details. Just leave it at the fact that Asians suck. The Chinese have small penises and the Indians are the most prone to ED -that’s erectile dysfunction for the uninitiated.

I’m sure this is an issue that Razib from Gene Expression would like to “tackle” when he gets the time.

Singlish translator available here for all of us Ang Mohs.

?

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Weekend Wrapup

Saturday was the beginning of the footy season for me and the rest of the Applecross Hawks – and we didn’t have to wait long for the heartbreak this year, going down by a solitary point in the opener. Great way to start.

My contribution to the game was limited to being involved in a 6 person brawl midway through the last quarter. Next week I’ll try to get a kick as well. I did manage to come away with a nice deep scratch on my neck, and some others on my arms and back. They were sustained accidentally though, the guy was trying to choke me, not scratch me.

Disappointment at the loss turned to triumph later in the night during the Windup/Medal presentation night for the Scarborough Cricket Club, held at the legendary Nookemburra Hotel. I managed to take out the coveted Duck Award in a tie with Dave Smith. 5 ducks for the season, 4 of which were goldens, including the first ever “King Pair” in the history of our esteemed club.

In a season in which records tumbled like nine pins, I also managed to break another one. The most runs conceded from an over now stands at 27! Another sterling achievement for yours truly.

The windup is always a dangerous night for Yobbos, as the beer is provided as nature intended it – free, and our club is notably short of sensible teetotalling types, meaning that there’s very little encouragement to drink in moderation. Special thanks go to Boof for supplying me with the pint of Jack Daniels and coke at closing time that got me moving along the line from “Happily Plastered” to “Absolutely Shitfaced”.

My night was capped off in the most memorable fashion imaginable – or at least would have been, if I could remember how it happened – when I somehow managed to roll my ankle in a dancing related incident at around 4am, before passing out behind a skip somewhere in Northbridge. As they say… “Scene Missing”

To cap it off, I managed to sleep through the Fremantle-Collingwood game on TV today, missing might what have been our best ever performance in Melbourne. Luke McPharlin – All Australian centre half back? What’s he paying?

Bulworth Surrenders

Skanky Hos – prepare to be pimpslapped: Lath‘ Daddy is large and in charge.

Federal Opposition leader Mark Latham promised the young people of Australia more “bling-bling”.

Mr Latham made the pledge during a light-hearted interview on Perth’s Nova 93.7 FM radio, where he was schooled on how to appear more “cool” than Prime Minister John Howard.

The Labor leader was given a T-shirt emblazoned with a new moniker Lath-Daddy, a pimp-style cap with a feather in it, and a hip-hop theme song: `Lath-Daddy’s in the house. Which house? The Lower House’.

“We’re going to take that all the way to Lodge,” Mr Latham declared.

The opposition leader was told that to win over youthful voters he needed to talk the talk, using phrases like “bling-bling” – an American hip-hop term referring to flashy jewellery.

“Youth of Australia, Labor’s policy is bling-bling,” said Mr Latham.

“Bling-bling for everyone”

Fo’ Shizzle My Nizzle!

Spin Starts Here has the 411.