Kill Whitey Guide (v 2.0)

The Amrozi method of targetting the destruction of infidels (Australians, Americans…. whatever, they are all white people) has now been updated, according to online Al Qaeda manual Targeting The Cities.

Terrorism expert Clive Williams said the document was significant as it named, for the first time, Australians rather than Westerners in general as the number one target in Indonesia. Mr Williams also said it appeared Australia was increasingly named in al-Qaeda documents as a result of involvement in the war in Iraq.


The 11-page manual by an al-Qaeda leader in Saudi Arabia, Abdulaziz al-Mokrin, ranks Australia fourth on an overall list of “human targets” behind Americans, British and Spanish and ahead of Canadians and Italians.

Interesting to note that the Spanish still rate above us, despite their new socialist president’s pledge to immediately withdraw troops from Iraq. Likewise, those poor Canadians just can’t get off the list no matter how hard they try.

Even more interesting though, is the ranking of exactly what type of infidels Al Qaeda would like to explode the most:

The manual also lists groups of people according to their importance as targets. Businessmen, bankers and economists are first, then diplomats, politicians and scholars, thirdly scientists, and experts and then soldiers. Tourists are ranked last.

Do you see what I see?

Yes, it’s strange that economists (like John Quiggin, a vocal opponent of the war in Iraq) rank higher than politicians (like that other John, who was directly involved in the decision to send Australians to Iraq). Perhaps Clive Williams was a little presumptious in attributing the cause to the Iraq war after all.

That’s not really the key feature though. I’m thinking specifically of the scholars. Or, as we like to call them here in infidel-land, Academics.

Ranking right alongside the warmongering politicians and child molesting diplomats are the ever-so-appeasing academics: Like Alison Broinowski, who revealed that the Bali bombing was ever so predictable. Beer swilling Australian tourists – causing Bali’s nightspots to become “jagged with strine” – were practically gagging for a bomb up the clacker.

Unfortunately for Alison’s theory, tourists are actually the least bombworthy of all the infidels!

Back to the drawing board then for Alison, who finds herself ranked above Australian soldiers, and right alongside Johnny Howard, on Al Qaeda’s list of bombees.

Academics like Alison would be well served to follow the example of the least hated class of infidel – the tourist. It’s not really that difficult…grab yourself a cheap ticket to Bali, rent a surfboard, knock back a few Bintangs and maybe drag one of the locals home for a bit of Jiggy-Jig. Don’t argue the price too much though. You might be mistaken for an economist.

Explore posts in the same categories: War

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