Get Yer Tall Poppies Here!
This one has got it all. Football players behaving badly, the evil machinations of the hamburgery-industrial complex, and poor defenceless kids! Won’t someone please, please, please, please think of the chiiiiiiiiiiiiildren!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
FAST food giant McDonald’s has been accused of running a covert marketing campaign in schools.
Famous footballers employed by the hamburger chain have plugged the McDonald’s menu, and free McDonald’s merchandise has been given to students under the guise of motivational talks in high schools.
Complaints surfaced after Hawthorn footballer Ben Dixon gave a McDonald’s sponsored talk to a group of 250 Doncaster Secondary College Year 9 students on Tuesday.
Don’t you love the emotive language? Fast food giant! Covert marketing campaign! Can’t be that covert if they’re giving out merchandise, can it?
Meanwhile, the Potato Marketing Board still has not drawn any fire from anyone, despite their deliberate targetting of children.
Up next: Ronald McDonald, The Hamburglar and Mayor McCheese accused of pack-raping a Wilderness Society Koala. However, the koala’s case isn’t looking very good either. Unlike footy groupies, who are all devout christians saving themselves for marriage to the boy next door, koalas have been proven to be dirty, dirty sluts.